dagger

“Skillful speech not only means that we pay attention to the words we speak and to their tone but also requires that our words reflect compassion and concern for others and that they help and heal, rather than wound and destroy.”

Bhante Henepola Gunaratana

These words appeared for the first time several years ago when I was grappling with the way I reacted to disappointing situations. The reactionary spew that sprang from my mouth often startled the person before me silencing them as the red heat of shame colored my face and uncomfortably consumed my body. My immediate apology was never enough to remove the dagger I had lodged into another. I wanted to change, said it out loud to others and set forth to be better. When I read Gunaratana’s words during my meditation that June morning, they became the mantra guiding my intent. Though I am still a work in progress, I have had success in my quest to think before I speak, choosing words that taste better in my mouth coupled with a satisfying side of listening.

I reached for the book Daily Wisdom today in search of Gunaratana’s quote and opened up to “pain is inevitable, suffering is not” written by the same wise soul followed by “never strike at the heart” from the spirit of Geshe Chekawa. So many of us fail to carefully ruminate before we part our lips to deliver what we think will be helpful counsel. We don’t fully grasp that once the words are out change is set in motion; no going back, things will never be the same.

danced too long
blahniks squeezing deliriously drunk on blind contentment blisters
blind sided
by a dark wall of invisible grafitti
I was slammed.
judgment w/o merit pointing accusatory fingers
across conviction stones of speculation
dignity smeared in thoughtless scrawl.
peel off the pain on the other side
inflated by visions that sustain
heart not buried by the wounds it sustained
change into new wisdom shoes.

forward is ahead.

As a child I hurled the phrase “sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me” and stuck out my pink tongue for emphasis! Even as the words left my mouth, I did not believe them. Words have wounded me, slashed my heart, snatched my speech, opened up floodgates, given me pause, made me think. I held on to those that made sense, discarded the ones that did not. More importantly, words have not had the power to destroy me. There is life after the ill-aimed dagger lands. Don’t allow the pain to consume you, forgive don’t forget, find the lesson because there is one, look ahead and...

keep your peepers open! ®